So, whenever I read other blogger's blogs, I have this visual of who I think they are. My mind's eye makes them perfect. "Oh, that's soooooo (blogger)!", I'd often think, as if they were that friend I've known since the 5th grade, who pretended to be allergic to peanuts in order to leave the lunchroom early so that he had first dibs on the school swings. I don't know a kid like that. You probably knew I didn't (recall the quickly diminishing genuineness MLIA and FML).
Here are some things that are true. I hope they justify your image of me to be something kind of remotely similar to who I actually am.
- I'm an average college student. School kicks hard. Grades kick harder. The lack of motivation takes the superlative: it kicks the hardest. I'm suffering from the last symptom.
- My two best friends are either across the country, or in a whole freaking other country altogether, for their ambitions and studies. I stayed at home, and I give that tilted-head-and-stretch-a-smile when people ask me where I'm attending. I justify that it's a good school, in my mind. Easier to get a higher GPA, less competition, no residence fees. (My head then snorts "yeah, mom's still here". And I heave a sigh, and ignore this facet of reality.)
- I know college boys are crazy. I strongly believe that I was somehow sheltered in my group of asexual friends all throughout high school, and I was overlooked everywhere. Now, not so much. Guys are stupid to begin with, but once they want a girl, they go bonkers. They shall stay anonymous, for the sake of their "manhood" and the existence of their balls. I doubt they'll ever find this blog site though.
- I wanted to be an artist up until middle school. Now, I aspire to have a career in the medical/psychological/pediatric field. Yay.
- At present, I can't stop listening to Anberlin's "Inevitable".
- I love Christmas. If you want to get into the holiday spirit the fast and cheap way, go shopping. As soon as you enter the profit-hungry institution (the mall), you'll be smothered in green and red and gold and silver and trinkets and the "must haves" for gift giving and etcetera. You will covet over many materialistic objects. But you will be submerged in every remotely related to the holidays, overhead music and everything. If you use public transit to arrive at said mall, you may encounter a musician who plays age old carols with guitar cases open.
- I swear. A lot. In fact, throughout this (and every future) blog, I force myself to not. Why? I don't know. There's a better way to convey a feeling than the general "Fuck!", "Shit!", or "FUUUUUUCCCCKKKKKK!!!". Right? Right.
- I like bran muffins. Shut up.
- I thought I had a unique name. That is, I never met anyone else with the same name as I did, until one day, I met an Amish girl with said name. Yes, an Amish girl, tight-bunned hair with the scarf thing, wearing those tan patterned one-piece dresses. Now, I have to deal with another girl with said name whose friends talk ceaselessly during my physics class. I do not enjoy hearing my name being whispered because it just feels weird. Like a bug flying around your head, or a spider trickling up your spine. For those of you who have this problem every day (so it's not really a problem now, is it?) and want me to shut my trap, be quiet. It's a new change, okay? YES, I know there are 6.8 billion people out there. Isn't it okay for that comforting childhood conviction "You are special" to ring true sometimes? It took longer for me to have my name swept underneath me. If this hasn't happened to you yet, lavish in that fact. (Don't be tempted to count how many people show up under the Facebook search of your name. It's an ugly site.)
These are the few things I can come up with within the time being. I find myself believing that rehearsing a presentation is very important. So I shall do that. See, first blog: so not epic.
-ShufflingHard
P.S. My name isn't actually that unique, apparently. Shut up, girl in physics. It's momentum, it's not exciting.
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